Well...we have dealt with disappointment once again. No baby. It's been a rough month, and that was not the news we wanted, but there's nothing I can do to change it at this point.
So...now we have been discussing our options, trying to figure out what is the best path to take. Adoption has been moved a little closer to the front, but I have to admit, I'm still just not sure. While I am not opposed to adoption, I just can't shirk the feeling that I want to be PREGNANT again. I know that adoption is a great way to build a family, and there are so many children who needs loving homes, there's still that tug in my heart.
Money, however, is making it clear that we have to make a decision. We can save up and try a different treatment for infertility, or we can save up and adopt. There just doesn't seem to be much wiggle room. It's either or. And I am terrified of making the wrong decision.
I just don't know what to do. Either way, we are stepping out in faith, waiting for God to bless us with a child. But, I don't know that I am ready to just give up on conceiving. There's always that pesky question, "What if the next time is the one?" Then again, I could be asking that forever.
Please pray for us as we move forward towards the fork in the road. We need direction and peace.
